Thursday, April 26, 2012

Bible Study Exam Question #1 Philippians 4:8

[Yeah, I know it says #1 in the post title, and that implies a promise.  The hell with that.  Just because I introduce a new blog feature doesn't mean it can't dribble out after 2 or 3 tries or never go on at all.  I've read plenty of blogs--really successful, popular ones!--and they all fiddle-fuck around like that.  Then again, you never know.]

Compare the following translations of Philippians 4: 8, from Holy Bible.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.--King James Version

And now, dear brothers and sisters, let me say one more thing as I close this letter. Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. --New Living Translation

Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious - the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. --The Message Bible

Since I got out of the box I don't need no fucking negativity in my life and you don't need it in yours, cabron.   Stay away from those pinche' pendejos.  Just keep thinking about all the good shit.  And whenever some bad shit goes down or the worm is eating inside you, and you want to drive down to T.J. or get into the tequila, just remember, amigo,  tu pinche hermana está bien pinche, wey. (Your fucking sister is so fucking ugly, dude!) e tu eres más feo que el culo de un mono (and you are uglier than a monkey's ass).   Aaaah! . . Hah! Hah! Hah! . . .

Which one is best and why?   Just skip the following commentary if you don't like overkill.

In a recent book about the King James translation, Harold Bloom marveled that fifty different translators, working in 5 or 6 teams, each led by an indifferent (in his estimation) scholar managed to produce such a masterpiece of unity and poetic beauty.    So I'm with Bloom about the first version.  The last passage isn't even an intentional translation; it's something I overheard at the Mission transcribed more or less verbatim that's weirdly apt for today's lesson, except where it veers into insult.   Actually, the insults fit right in with Philippians 4: 8, in a satirical way.   And as a piece of living speech it beats out the middle two selections or any other bible translation aside from the KJV, which were obviously--and marvelously--done by circus pinheads with lead and mercury poisoning. 

No comments:

Post a Comment